Angie read the e-mail on her screen, over and over again, and tried to convince herself that she might have misunderstood some parts in it. She didn’t like what she read. The e-mail was from a young man she had recently met on the internet and although she had spoken with him for a few times on the internet and over the phone, she had a gut feeling that there was something wrong with this story and with this man. She couldn’t tell what was fishy in this guy but she had a vague feeling that something wasn’t quite right.
First of all, she couldn’t grasp why this guy was constantly nagging over anything he was doing. Secondly, this guy seemed to her to be a very self-centered person, who had almost everything except the woman of his life and he was talking to her only for the purpose of filing that void and of catching up with time. He constantly repeated to her that he was running out of time, and she never managed to understand why or how or what he meant exactly when he said that he was late. The first time he called her on the telephone he asked her whether she had an apartment, and when she told him that she lived alone in a rented flat, he said: “Marry me and you will have a flat”. She laughed when she heard him saying that, she thought he was joking, and she clearly told him, to slow down and to take it easy, but he didn’t seem to grasp what she was saying. She even tried to tell him to “enjoy” what he was doing, but her words – no matter how simple she thought they were – fell on deaf ears.
All her life, she dreaded going on a first date. Let us say that she never found the idea compelling or the fact of making a first impression very successful. And for the last couple of years, she kept meeting guys who weren’t her type and she used to wonder over and over again while sitting on a table with a man, how on earth would she be able to spend a lifetime with him, if she can’t manage to end successfully her first date with him, and invariably with almost every single date, she used to find the time – even the 30 minutes short date – excessively long (and never-ending).
And now, there was this guy… Edgard who was making her feel uncomfortable… She felt that he had an agenda, an idea of his bride in mind and that he was trying to download his concept on her. In a way, he was modeling her and imposing on her his thoughts for his future wife. She could try to think, but he would convince her in his own way, that his thoughts are more powerful and more important, and therefore he will make her follow his thinking. Imagine, that he constantly asked her, where she was and what she was doing… And when she told him – innocently – that she was at the gym or attending a class – he asked her to stop going to class and to save the money…
She tried to ask him questions, because she likes to ask questions, and she used to feel that he hardly answered any question.
She tried to suggest things he could do to improve his days at the office, but he didn’t seem to follow her thinking or even to listen to what she was saying. And he constantly repeated to her to stop whatever she was doing and to think of him… He even asked her today – only 7 days after she met him online – if she thought of him and for how long… Can you imagine that? Would you ask your girlfriend, or your friend or your wife such a question? Would you ask this question to someone you have just met?
The problem, she believed, was that he thought that he knew her. So she tried to ask him what he knew exactly about her. She asked him if he knew her family name, her father’s name, her age, where she works, what is her job title,… you know, simple questions that “normal” people who know each other usually ask and know. And he couldn’t answer any of these questions, because he simply didn’t know and because he never asked her these questions.
So what do you think? What do you suggest she does? Should she give this “story” a chance or simply walk away?
Thank you 🙂
(By Zeina Gabriel)